Star Monster
by Nevermore Marni
Summary: Wendy has never been normal. She stays up all night reading angsty fanfiction and her best friend is the idiot who decided that portable pencil sharpeners should have little screws and not bolts. She fully embraces her demons and she makes sure they are well provided for. So is this Wendy's suicide note or something a little less... Normal. You decide.
1. Chapter 1

There has always been something wrong with me, not that anyone can see it.  
Even when they do get a glimpse of it, they just brush it off like its nothing.

"_Oh Wendy_!" My mother was always the root of my problems, not that she meant to be. "Why do you do this to yourself? You have such pretty skin."

I know I have pretty skin mother, I've seen more of it than you could ever understand. I've seen it from the inside. She really meant well, but you know addicts, everything's always about them.  
How could THEIR lives be so difficult?  
Why are the drugs THEY like so expensive?  
Why does it have to be HER daughter that ended up the freak?

As I sat quietly as I often do late nights and I ran the blade over my arm again, rocking it on the parts of my wrists where my bones protruded my skin. I watched as my scars reopened and ran down my arm and onto my bedroom floor. I could feel my heart racing as I drug my dulling razor down my already badly broken flesh.  
I am not at all finished.

There is a thirst inside me, one that can only be quenched when my blood runs on the outside.

You don't have to say it.  
I already know.

What I fail to understand is why it is socially acceptable to be a drug addict but not a cutter.

"Wendy, drug addicts aren't constantly trying to end their lives."  
Well, they most certainly don't have to try. Had I wanted to end my life, I would have to want it so badly I could taste it.  
I would have to take this blade and put it through my arm. People over dose and die accidentally every day. Last time I checked, I've never heard of anyone who "accidentally" sliced their wrist the wrong way and found the golden ticket to the big chocolate factory in the sky.  
If I wanted to die, I would. Simple as that.

I put my finger in a puddle and ran it over the hard wood so it looked like an angry sunset seeping into my bedroom floor. I drew in a red crescent moon and even a couple stars off to the left, there. Right there. That one. That one is my star.

I must confess, I feel like a monster sometimes. When you hear about little girls cutting themselves its something big and traumatic.  
My Daddy doesn't love me.  
My Mommy's on drugs.  
My Boyfriend beat me up last night.  
I woke up without pants on.  
I think I have a concussion.

Not me. I do it because I like it. I'm ashamed, really.  
I hate it when people see them and try to pity me. Like they don't even know who I am and here they are trying to pity me.

"Wendy, you're not a monster!" I was always jealous of Lily. Unfortunate she wasn't very bright. "You're a good person."

I don't care weather or not you live or die. Doesn't that make me a monster?

Don't tell me there isn't a monster inside me. I can feel it breathing with my lungs, I can taste the way it craves my blood and I can tell it will only keep growing. I absentmindedly cut stars into my arms as I lay on my floor. There's a beast in me and I can't control it. I love it, it is the only thing in this world that understands me. When it takes over its like waves of tingling ecstasy; like a drug is washing away all the pain. All the rage. All the guilt from not feeling guilty.

There was a boy who understood me once, he was-  
Lets just say he was all too ready to let his shadows take him away from this sick place.  
He often told me that just because you had a demon inside you, the fact alone didn't inherently make you a monster yourself.

He was wrong. Monsters don't like to live with little girls who tell them they won't give them anything they want.

In the end this monster is the only one who really cares about me anymore. It never tells me I'm sick or asks me to stop. He holds my hand as I give in to the monster I am growing in too. I don't mind. Its just easier this way. While you lie cold and alone in a bed that's too big for one person, I remain happy all by myself.

Even when someday I make the same bed Shadow Boy made, my demons will keep my bones warm; Just as I keep their cravings at bay, they give me a comfort you don't get from another human being. The kind of comfort you get when you take the first bite from a warm biscuit, or the last sip of tea. The kind of comfort you get when you finger paint bleeding sunsets on your mothers new hard wood flooring.

A comfort that only comes when you try to kill your pain a little more...  
_Directly._

I felt something in my heart break as my thoughts rested on the Shadow Boy's head stone.  
It had stars too.  
The star on my arm has become too muddled in blood to see where I'm carving.

I think about my mother. My poor innocent mother. She thought his death was a tragic accident.  
Its hilarious, really.

I take my blade and in one swift movement I slice from the top of my wrist straight down through my star, all the way to my elbow joint. I watched as it streamed onto the floor in rivers. Like the clouds gave up on rain and just dropped buckets of this slick red wonder onto the floors of my childhood. I watch for almost a full minute before something snaps in my head.

Completely laughable.  
Cutters don't die accidentally.

I quickly put on a black hoodie and press the fabric into my skin to stop the bleeding. I can see my blood in little mesh patterns from where it has bled through. It doesn't phase me. I crawl into my bed and enjoy the warm embrace of an appeased demon. It will stop bleeding.

When a cutter dies- _It's completely planned for._

* * *

Well hello everyone!

It's that time of year again!

Miss Marni needs a place to put her crazy sooooooo...

Welcome to either my new thing or Wendy's suicide note.

Only time will tell.

With work how it is I still haven't found an editor, so I do apologize for all my grammar transgressions.

Slap me in the face. With a Review. Thanks.

With all my love,

MXM


	2. Chapter 2

Wendy awoke in a haze, her arm felt tight as if nail polish had dried on her arm. She could feel the way it cracked and chipped when she moved and the way it pulled her skin tight when she stretched. She had made it through the night once again. She stared up at her ceiling and sighed.

She still hated the world. She still hated every living person in the world

There was still war, there were still children starving in Africa. The US government was still putting fluoride in her drinking water to keep her a mindless puppet of society. There was still a nuclear power plant oozing into the world via Japan. The whales were still safer starving to death and being slaves to entertain america's youth rather than in their natural habitats.

Her father still didn't love her.  
Her mother was still a drug addict.  
Her boyfriend had still beaten her up two nights ago.  
She had still woken up with out pants the morning after.  
She still thought she had a concussion.

But she felt better.

Really and truly, she didn't know why. But that morning Wendy Bartlett felt much, much better. So she went to her floor where she has smeared blood the night before, dumped some of her drinking water out of her plastic jug and wiped the stain clean. She then sat at her vanity and plastered on all the fake-ness she needed to get herself though the day. She started with her swollen eyes, patting foundation and concealer into her thick eyelids. They stung as she layered on an especially dark shade of brown over the redder parts of her eye and swooped a golden hue in the corners. It was getting ridiculous how easy it was to cover up the mess. She started on the bruise on her cheek bone. She wasn't exactly sure what to do with it, usually when Danny hit her it wasn't anywhere people could see.

_So what now? _She thought to herself. _I guess it would be a good time to tell people you've taken up kick boxing..._

Wendy laughed. What a stupid notion, she only had one person who cared enough to need to be lied too.

_Lily is never going to believe I took up kick boxing... She regularly has to make me get up to use the bathroom..._

Wendy brushed some concealer over the bruise, maybe she could cover it if she had a little faith and tried hard enough.

_I could tell her I fell...That's stupid! This whole thing is stupid! _Wendy threw down her make up brush. It didn't matter. She'd just pretend like she didn't know she had it. _Laugh like its no big deal. Like you hadn't even noticed it while you were putting on all this make up. Play it off like she's ridiculous for even noticing._

"What bruise?" She said into her mirror, she giggled and watched the way her eyes crinkled when she spoke. "I didn't even notice it," She laughed again "I wonder how that happened. I must have smacked my head off the bunk bed bars last night," she paused again to laugh "I must have been out cold."

She practiced her smile in the mirror a thousand times before she was satisfied, but when she was she stood and put on a long sleeved black scoop neck shirt and a pair of her favorite jeans. She smiled in the mirror once more before she re-did her pony tail and put on a layer of chap stick.

"Wendy?" She heard her mother call "Are you ready?"

"Yes," she said as she touched up her eyeliner "I'm coming."

* * *

When Wendy arrived at school Danny, as always, was the first to see her. He smiled a _very _convincing smile and kissed her forehead lightly.

"Sweetheart, what happened? You're bruised" he cooed.

She stopped walking and just looked at him like a was a complete idiot as he smirked expectantly.

"What. Bruise." She said threw gritted teeth. " I must have slept right through BEATING my head off the bars on the top bunk."

"Well that was foolish." He squeezed her hand tightly "Should be more careful."

"Yeah, there are a lot of things I should do." she batted her eyes sweetly as she took her hand from his.

She could see Lily walking up the side walk, she hoped she could compose herself before she had to explain her face.

Lily was wearing this beautifully beaded dress that made her perfectly tanned skin look like some kind of natural wonder.  
_God, I hate her sometimes._ Wendy thought. Lily looked perfect, as always. Her make up was subtle and classy and her dress shimmered in the early spring sun.

It almost looked unnatural when she twisted her face into one of concern as she grabbed Wendy's face in her hand.

"Oh my god, Wednesday! What happened to your face? It looks like somebody hit you with a freaking 2x4!"

Wendy could barely talk through Lily's fingers smushing her face together.

"Wut du yu mean?" she squeezed out between her compressed lips.

"Shut up! You have to know! What- did you do your make up in the dark-or what?" Lily released her face and crossed her arms with a giddy smile.

"Don't I always?" Wendy gave a giggle that nobody would ever know was fake. "It can't be that bad, it doesn't even hurt."

Danny gave an amused smirk as Lily forced her bag into his hands and she searched for a compact mirror. When she found it, she offered it to Wendy, her face still in some unnatural panic. Wendy opened it with a gasp.

"What the hell?" She said as she traced the bruise with her fingers. "I must have like-" she let out a loud giggle "hit my head off the guard rail last night. I'm not used to sleeping on the top bunk."

"Wednesday!" Lily snapped the mirror closed. "I thought you were in some epic gang war or something!"

Wendy laughed again "Well, I wasn't." she crossed her arms. "Just me being-"

"Just Wendy being Wendy." Danny laughed "I bet she didn't move off that bed all night either! I'm really surprised she crawled all the way up to the top bunk, all she does is sleep, you'd think she'd just crash on the floor when she walked through the door!"

"Haha." Wendy said enthusiastically, "Yep. I'm lazy. I got it. We better go get breakfast before they run out of breakfast pizza."

* * *

I think that's it for this installment.

I don't think I have anything left in me to write.

Leave me something that makes me happy.

Like a review.

MXM


	3. Chapter 3

Wendy

* * *

Lily and I have been best friends since second grade when this over sized buffoon, Jodie Perkins, pushed her off the monkey bars.

That ape girl Jodie and I had a nice long talk and she apologized to Lily and never, ever bothered us again.

Especially Lily. Nobody ever picked on Lily after that.

Excluding me, that is. She's my best friend and I'll pick on her if I damn well please.

"Wendy." I could hear my mothers first groan of spring break. "Weeeeeeendyyyyyyyyyy."

"Yes Mother, dear?" I tried to drape my sarcasm in something more comforting. I know she's sick, she's always sick on Thursday.

Its the end of her weekend. You'd think as an experienced drug addict she would have learned to ration her drugs through out the week, or find a way to get more.

I guess she already works two jobs and does her best to get to her college classes on the real weekends.

Not that those two jobs have done much to save us, but to be fair we are still recovering from when she went all loony, moved us to Alabama for a summer and sold all our shit for- You guessed it!

_More Drugs._

"Can you bring me some wine? _Please."_

I bet my teachers wonder why I always miss school on Thursdays. Lily obviously knows, but Lily knows everything.

Well. Almost everything.

I'm really just content to be off for the week, I need the time off. I almost forgot to ask if I could go to Lily's for the weekend. I got Danny to run Shelly to my aunt's house, so I can probably rock that until at least Saturday night.

I barely noticed myself zombie walking into the kitchen to feed my mother's demons, I opened the fridge and held a filmy glass up to the box of cheap wine my mother probably got from a sleezy gas station in crack town. _Crack Town? Really? Come on Wendy. That's all you've got?_

She barely noticed me as I walked through her bed room door. She was sleeping on her side like I'd asked her too, which made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

At least she isn't going to choke when she throws up all over the new floor.

_These new wood floors have been really dirty lately..._ My brain flashed back to the bleeding sunset on my own floor.

"Here." I gave her my arm and did my best to pull her into a sitting position as she moaned, her back pressed up against the head board and her hair curled with day old styling mousse.

"My whole body hurts." She said as she took the glass from my hand.

"You know," I started bitterly "It probably wouldn't hurt so bad if-"

"Wendy. That is quite enough." She interrupted her gulp. "Thank you."

I sat next to her, mostly to keep her from spilling that rotten grape shit all over her bed. Again.

I can still see all the faded purple and red stains littering the bed from times when shes spilled. Little drops that almost look like delicate little splatter flowers from when she was trying to adjust her blankets or fix her hair. Big splotches from when she's gotten too high and passed out. Oddly huge, almost antiqued yellow stains with a strange translucent brown linings in the middle of the mattress from what I can only assume is from one of her white wine nights. Maybe some kind of extra large beer.

I just don't understand how it could be so big. Was this a sudden realization of her alcoholism and bad parenting skills? Did this come after almost drowning my baby sister in the bath tub or smacking me in the face? After she kicked Peter out the night he became my Shadow Boy, instead of just the kid who grew up next door? Did she dump the whole bottle as some kind of motivational tick? Or was this from one of her benders when she and her sister had some kind of weird six person party in here? Did they all spill wine in the same spot? I bet they were playing some kind of weird game and that's where they put the cards or whatever. Like kings cup. Maybe the big cup spilled. I don't freaking kn-

Pee. I'm sitting in pee. I'm sitting in my mothers. Fucking. Pee.

I'm putting a sheet on this bed. That is completely ridiculous. She is 32 years old, for Christ sake. What the hell does this look like? This is a bed. Not a fucking toilet.

I try to put my mind as far away from it as much I can as I watch my mother's head bob into her cup.

"Can I go to Lily's? Her parents are having a cook out and her mom is making me fruit salad and grilled zucchini and corn and stuff." I tried to talk quickly before I had to wake her. Its always no if I have to wake her.

"Does your sister have clean clothes for school tomorrow?" She grunted

"Its spring break. There is no school tomorrow." I steadied her glass before she made another rose colored stain on her bed.

"Then where is she?"

_Are you kidding? You don't care where she is when you're gone for six days straight. Just when I want to go somewhere. _I could feel my thoughts slipping into that monster they become when I've been alone too long.

When the monster grows hungry. When I have nothing left to give this woman when I've given her more than I had to live on. More than I need to breath.

"Danny and I took her to Aunt Tris's yesterday." I breathed

"You took her to _Beatrice's _yesterday. Say her name correctly."

The woman is so anal. Of course with a name like Jane you'd never understand why someone would shorten their name.

"Danny and I took her to Aunt _Beatrice's _yesterday afternoon. She and Desiree wanted to go camping for spring break and I need Lily to help me study-"

"Why can't Lily come here?"

Oh. My. God. Mother. Nobody wants to come here. Nobody wants to watch you get drunk, shoot up and then pass out on the floor if I'm damn lucky.

I paused before my thoughts came out and I had to sit with her again. Sobbing about how she's a terrible mother while she promises to do better, between sips of wine, but never does.

"...Lily's parents are having a cook out." I repeated "Her family is all going to be there, I can't ask her to bail. Her mom made all this special stuff for me-"

"For what?" She said as she rubbed her eyes.

"To eat?" My voice wavered. I'm used to repeating myself over and over for her and I'm used to her stupid questions. But I doubt I'll ever have the patience for them.

"Why do you need special stuff? Are you like on a diet? I need to go on a diet." She rambled as she grabbed the stretched mark scarred skin at her stomach. Her ribs poked from either side of her t-shirt and I couldn't help but notice her cheeks were looking abnormally thin. I wonder if she switched back to speed. That's when she stops eating, I mean she's always on some weird diet, but she only gets this skinny when she's on speed. I glanced at my mother's face to try to diagnose her current disease. There aren't many scabs, so I guess if she switched she hasn't been on it long. Of course our family is prone to two or three large zits rather than clusters of small ones, so its hard to tell if she's picking her face or popping her zits. Which she also has a weird affinity for.

"I don't eat meat anymore mom. Factory farming is a demented practice."

I don't like the texture of carcass in between my teeth, Mother. You supposedly raised me. This is not a new development. I've disliked meat since I can remember, distinctly since you _encouraged_ me to go to my sperm donors house every weekend and that useless excuse for a house wife of his felt the need to serve hockey puck steak every Sunday because its "Daddy's favorite" and he felt like I needed to eat everything on my plate because steak is expensive, not that you can tell after she let her hell spawn take it to the underworld to make us all leather to eat for dinner. Fucking delicious.

God, I'm angsty today. I hope Lily is ready for this, I kind of already feel sorry for her. Maybe I'll just stay home. No need to bring Lily down, her whole family is over and I would hate to make her put up with my bullshit and still try to be happy little Lily.

"Are the dishes done?" Mom prodded.

"We ran out of propane yesterday, if I would have known we weren't going to have hot water I would have taken all the laundry to Lily's and done it over the weekend and done the dishes first, but I didn't realize we were on a limit. I thought you were picking some up on Tuesday, since we got Dad's check."

"Are you fucking kidding me?!" She snapped "Wendy! That is the only thing I asked you to do!"

"Yeah, but I did the ones that-"

"No buts young lady! Do the dishes and then I'll take you to Lily's." She slumped back into her bed, setting her empty glass on the floor.

"I'll walk." I sulked as I exited her room and walked down the hall zombie-fied into the kitchen.

I sighed as I turned on the faucet, taking a sponge and dabbing it with the watered down remains of dish soap left in the virtually empty bottle, I plunged my hands into the icy water.

I stood rocking back and forth trying to scrub the day old spaghetti-o's from a bowl Shelly had left sit in her room and apparently, just thought to bring out before she was about to leave for break. Shelly's dishes we always the worst, at least Mom had the decency to eat out or not at all. Sometimes she'd eat this awful bagged frozen chicken that was mostly gristle with the frozen vegetable that was on sale that week. But those were always easy to wash, no grease. Grease is fattening. Nothing was bad unless she fell asleep and burnt it.

I held my breath as I approached Mom's protein shaker. That _Thing... _That thing was always terrible. I don't care if she just dropped it on the floor, the inside always smelled like something died in there. Unfortunately for me, it was half full of curdled since Tuesday chocolate protein mix. I dumped the green speckled chunks into the sink and rinsed it as thoroughly as I could before I stuck the sponge in. I learned rather quickly that if I do the top first I'll have to rewash it at the end but my arm won't smell like rotten power mix all day. So that's what I did, I started at the top and got all the lid ridges and worked my way down to the gross layer of mucus at the bottom. Rinse. Breath.

I breathed too soon. I could feel my cereal making a celebrity appearance in the back of my throat. All I smell is protein shake and my mouth is full of chewed cereal and warm acidy milk. I couldn't help myself, grateful that Danny had taken the trash out when we took Shelly to Tris's, I emptied myself into the clean trash bag. My hair fell forward, threatening to smell like vomit until I made the trek to Lily's, but in some kind of luck I managed to keep my mane out of my squalor. I heaved, nothing was coming up. What I can only describe as a stomach acid flavored foam started slowly trailing up my throat and into the trash can. After a few minutes of dry heaving, I was able to stand.

I was almost disappointed in myself, any other day I'd have forced myself to swallow it. I knew very well that there is nothing left in the house to eat, seeing as we'd been off school for three days now. And had I not been going to Lily's I'd be starving all night until I could try to coax my mother into ordering some food or driving me to the grocery store.

_Okay. Only the breakfast dishes and you can leave for Lily's. _I thought to myself as I wiped mine and Shelly's pre-rinsed dishes. I mean, two bowls, two spoons. Not so bad.

No big deal.

I wiped the remaining spittle from my lips with my frigid fingers and filled a cup with water before I turned off the faucet. I walked into my mom's bed room to find her laying on her back snoring and fidgeting with the blankets. I turned her on her side before covering her up with her comforter. She was freezing, and sweating like a pig.

"I'm going to Lily's now Mama, I left you the last piece of pizza in the fridge and there's a glass of water on the floor next to your bed. I love you."

I swept the hair from her face and she shuttered at my touch. It must have slipped my mind how cold my hands must be.

Feelings aren't really my strong suit anymore, I guess.

* * *

Okay, well I know it's bee a year and I'm very sorry.

I also know this was just some rambling.

But! I will try to do better next time.

Next chapter I feel like experimenting with Lily, so bear with me. Okay?

Thank you all so much for your awesome-ness!

Also, still no editor. My bad for all my spelling and grammar transgressions.

I love you!

MXM


	4. Chapter 4

**Lily**

* * *

Wendy and I have been best friends since second grade when this girl named Jodie Perkins, who had been held back twice and was already freaking ginormous to begin with, pushed me off the monkey bars.

Which isn't something you'd think would make a pair of best friends, but when I got back from the nurse's office Jodie didn't waste anytime, she came right up to me and apologized.

I didn't know what happened, I didn't care. Wendy gave me her last Bubbles sticker, because she knew which powerpuff girl I liked. Which explained why my locker and all my books were covered in sugar, spice and everything nice. Stickers from a girl who wasn't even my best friend yet. Just a girl that a played with most of the time. We hadn't had our first sleep over. We didn't even sit by each other at lunch.

Wendy never liked powerpuff girls. I did. After we started hanging out she only watched it with me because it made me happy.

Wendy was always weird like that, she was this callous, bitter- for lack of a more graceful word- bitchy and depressed girl who even at the ripe old age of six and a half never liked anybody, even though everybody seemed to like her really well.

But she liked me, at least better than she liked anyone else at the time. And for Wendy, that was really all you could ever ask for.

When she got to pick a prize in class, instead of picking the Batman stickers that I know she would have rather had, she got the powerpuff girls stickers that she knew I wanted.

When we got to go for recess she always played on the swings with me, even though she preferred the monkey bars. Because we both knew I just wasn't suited for climbing.

So when I got to pick a prize in class, I always got the Batman stickers so she could plaster her locker and her books with them and I could have them for her when she got hurt jumping off the swings.

And when Jodie Perkins pushed my clutzy butt off the monkey bars that Wendy loved so much, Wendy made Jodie Perkins eat dirt until I got back from the nurse and apologized.

Which took about fourteen minutes, for your information.

My best friend, who probably weighed around sixty pounds soaking wet, made the school bully eat dirt for fourteen minutes until I got back from the nurse so she could apologize.

Makes you wonder who the real bully was, huh?

In any case, nobody ever bothered me again. Except Wendy. Wendy probably made me cry twice a week till middle school. The big question is, was it worth it?

"Tiger Lily! Foods almost ready, where's Wendy?" My Mama chirped as she watched Daddy flip the burgers and fiddle with a tin foil basket I knew had to be Wendy's dinner.

"I called her house phone, nobody answered. She must be on her way." I smiled. I will always be grateful for how understanding my parents are. The first time I brought Wendy over for a sleep over, sometime after her suspension for the whole Jodie Perkins fiasco, my mom was really worried about her anger issues. You know, with the whole dirt thing. But when Wendy's mom dropped her off in the snow in her pajamas without shoes or a winter coat, she kind of just became the big sister I never had. My parents snatched my best friend up like she was made of gold and ever since then there has always been a place set at dinner for Wendy. The year after fourth grade when her real little sister was born, little Shelly-Belly was invited too.

Wendy never liked to have to bring her sister along, but when she had too, she had too. I mean, we barely saw Shelly while we were at my house anyways. We were like eight or nine and Shelly could just barely walk, my mom just ate that up. I'm kind of the only child, I guess I kind of tore mom up on the way out. My parents are always really good at saying its not my fault, and I know its not, but I can't help but kind of feel sorta responsible for it sometimes. Anyways, for one reason or another, my Mama can't have any more babies. So Wendy and Shelly really brightened up their world, I think. They always seem happier when there's kids in the house. It breaks my heart how old me and Wendy got, because Shelly has her cousin Desiree now, so whenever Wendy comes Shelly goes to her aunt's house. I know my parents would love to have Shelly over too, but they just feel weird about asking. I do my best to get her here every so often. I've never seen Wendy's mom turn down a free baby sitter and Wendy has detention at least two or three times a week.

Of course Wendy seldom serves detention. One time in eighth Vice Principal Hinds gave her a Saturday SAC, which is like all day detention starting at six in the morning on Saturday, for getting caught texting her mom for like the tenth time. So she took her phone like they're supposed too, but Wendy's mom-

"Lil?"

Geeze. All this thinking about Wendy has me hearing her voice.

Anyways, they called Wendy into the office and tried to call her mom, but she didn't answer. So, Wendy innocently told them that if they called from her cell phone she would answer.

So they did. -

Do you guys hear like... a popping noise? Oh. Wait, nevermind. I guess its just me in here. Duh.

So they used Wendy's cell phone to call her mom and they put her on speaker and the whole office hears Wendy's mom screaming at the top of her lungs that her daughter will call, text or effing carrier pidgin her whenever she needs her too. That she won't be serving the Saturday SAC and that if her cell phone wasn't returned that moment that she was going to walk right up into our school and, her words flat out, staple her to her effing desk.

The Vice Principal pretended she didn't hear it, but that was one of the years Peter, who weirdly enough was the office aid for both Wendy's bad years, heard everything and his desk was all the way across the administration office.

Isn't that craz- I swear I can hear some kind of weird snapping sound...

Oh.

* * *

"Liiiiiilllyyyy. Earth to Lily." Wendy snapped her fingers loudly in front of Lily's face. "Dude. Seriously? Snap out of it."

By the time Lily had noticed Wendy was sitting next to her, the food Wendy had set right under her nose had cooled enough for her to eat it.

Not that it bothered Wendy any. She was happy enough occasionally scalding her tongue if it meant she could shovel food in her any faster.

"You brought me a cheese burger." Lily smiled as she handed Wendy a napkin. "With pickles and ketchup."

Wendy swallowed the mouthful of food she'd been battling and gave Lily a dumb look before wiping the butter and the little pieces of corn away with her sleeve.

"Yeah?" Wendy said as she picked up a fork and started on the fried zucchini. "Did you start liking something else on your cheese burgers?

"How did you know I wanted potato salad?" she asked as she did her best to look like a lady while trying to fit a giant disc of meat into her mouth.

"Look Bubbles, you've pretty much been eating the same thing since- forever." Wendy started picking at her own potato salad "You like dill pickles on your burgers and you like sweet relish on your hot dogs. You'd eat potato salad every day if your mom would let you and you don't like cake."

Lily gave her an insane look just before noticing the two huge pieces of cake on a side plate strategically placed behind a rather large center piece.

"Which is why, I'm eating it for you. Because I'm -such- a good friend." Wendy barely had time to finish her _Mean Girls_ impersonation before Lily tackled her to the ground, her hand full of cake.

And while Lily was sitting on top of her laughing and smearing chocolate sheet cake all over Wendy's face, Wendy did her very best to not choke to death laughing while trying to eat as much of the cake as possible.

Wendy tried to roll, but she was just not big enough. She was laughing too hard, her mind warped by chocolate and her body heavy under her significantly more solid best friend, she heaved and tried again to lift her friend off of her, with no success. Wendy struggled to reach the other piece of cake as she wormed and wiggled closer Lily lost her balance. Wendy saw the opportunity and she rolled her hysterical best friend onto the ground under her. As she grasped the second piece of cake and looked it over, Lily caught a look in her eye she'd never seen.

"Oh my gosh, Wednesday!" She could barely breath through her giggles "Are you like in love with that cake or what? You don't even look at your boyfriend like that!"

And with out a second thought Wendy licked the top layer of frosting off the cake and smeared it across Lily's entire face.

"I have been known to have strong feelings about cake." Wendy laughed as she stood up and offered her best friend a hand up.

But neither girl could help but remember that one time in second grade when that bitch Jodie Perkins pushed Tiger Lily off the monkey bars because she had a weird name and then her best friend Wendy, who was always and is still to this day the smallest in their class, smashed that fat whore's head into a monkey bar and then made her eat dirt for fourteen minutes while Wendy's neighbor Peter took pictures.

* * *

Okay, Okay. Serious shit next chapter. Promise.

I'm just all happy. Its not March.

You know I only write good in March.

My bad bros.

I love you all though. And to be fair that is two updates in a night.

So. I think I'm doing alright.

So... Reviews for meee? Puh-lease.

MXM


	5. Chapter 5

_"Wendy." _

Wendy rolled in her sleep. The blankets were stifling her, wrapping around her neck and choking her without intention.

_"Wendy... Why are you letting him do this to you?"_

She groaned before mumbling something unrecognizable under her breath.

_"This is not the Wendy I knew."_

She rolled into the bars of her bed with a loud thump. Her arm shoved in between the bars and her toe nails made a loud scraping against the rusted metal.

_"Wendy..." _The voice sounded as if it was sitting right next to her, desperately trying to wake her from a nightmare she couldn't escape.

_"Wendy!"_

She slammed into the bars again, a loud creaking shook the bed as the rusted bars finally folded after ten years of Wendy's night terrors.

The bars scraped into her back as she fell from the ceiling to the floor where she spent her nights bleeding; Where she lay bleeding now.

Her eyes fluttered open, she could almost make out a shadow on her wall and fingertips sweeping the bloodied hair from her cheeks.

_"Why are you letting him hurt the only girl I ever loved?"_

"Peter!" She wailed as she jolted from the floor.

"Peter?"

Wendy touched her face, it was wet with blood. She did her best to stand, her knees weak from the fall and losing blood fast.

She slumped the the bathroom to examine her wounds, eyes widening in terror as she saw the blood running from her back and stomach.

The wounds were cosmetic. The word that the blood was forming on her stomach was far more... shocking.

_"Neverland."_

"And that was it. It was there, he was there. I'm not crazy." Wendy told the man in the desk.

Wendy had been seeing a psychiatrist for quite some time now, but James Hooke was by far the best she'd had.

"Do you feel like this could be some kind of coping mechanism, some kind of way to speak to the loved one you lost?" He asked sternly

"No, really, Peter was there, in my room. Telling me to leave my boyfriend and come to neverland."

"And where exactly is this- Neverland, Wendy?"

Wendy paused. Anything she said now already sounded crazy.

"Wendy?"

She shrugged. How was she supposed to believe she wouldn't be committed right now if she told him that Neverland is where all the dead kids go? That would be ridiculous.

"Canada, maybe." Wendy laughed.

"So you're going to run to Canada to be with your deceased boyfriend?" the doctor asked.

"I guess I am." Wendy shrugged. "Welp. Times up."

She smiled as she stood.

"Thanks Doc."

"Wendy! We still have 20 minutes!"

"No, really. I feel much better. Thanks." She waved as she walked out the door and out the building.

Lily had come to expect her appointments running short and was waiting in the parking lot with a pack of the clove cigarettes she loved and a pack of the cowboy killers Wendy so desperately needed after her appointments.

Wendy hopped in the car and slammed the door.

"That bad?" Lily smiled, offering her a lighter.

"He thinks I'm crazy." Wendy lit her cigarette and took a drag before she caught sight of a figure in the rear view mirror.

A boy, with sandy blonde hair and green eyes like emeralds.

"You are crazy." Peter laughed as Wendy dropped her cigarette into her lap.

"Wendy! Are you okay?" Lily did her best to pat out the embers on her lap.

"Yeah. Yeah. I'm fine, lets just get out of here..."

Okay! Well. Sorry about the fuckery.

Kind of off to see the wizard right now.

Love you all.

Leave me some love!

MXM


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